Saturday, October 30, 2010

Fruit of the gods...

It’s that time of the year!  No, I don’t mean the “holiday season.”  I mean it’s the time of year when I can go to the store and purchase one of the most profoundly opulent gifts of nature, the pomegranate.  Some people feel the work it takes to seed a pomegranate is more trouble than it’s worth.  These people are fools.  Ok, I may be a bit judgmental, but pomegranates are a divine decadence.  If you don’t believe me ask the gods.  After all, the pomegranate has been the fruit of the gods for centuries.  Not one god, but many gods, many religions.

Many religions see the pomegranate as religiously significant.  In Judaism the pomegranate is one of the Seven Species and some Jewish scholars believe it may have been the forbidden fruit in the Garden of Eden.  Some believe the number of seeds in a pomegranate to be 613, the same number of mitzvot in the Torah.[1]  Judaism is only one of the religions who believe the pomegranate to be spiritually significant.  It’s depicted in many religious paintings, murals, and stained glass windows.  Often a burst pomegranate symbolizes the abundance of Jesus suffering.  Islam too, believes the fruit to be one grown in the gardens of paradise  and the appearance of the pomegranate is frequent in Greek mythology as a symbol of fertility as well.  It is undeniably the fruit of the gods.

If its symbolism as thee divine fruit isn’t enough to convince you that pomegranates are worth the time and effort it takes to seed and eat them then maybe the nutritional value will.  It’s commonly stated that some “beneficial properties of the fruit are the prevention of both heart disease and some forms of cancer.”[2]  Pomegranates are rich in antioxidants and have the ability to act in similar ways as aspirin for people with heart problems.  In addition they may have the ability to reduce inflammation and ease the suffering of arthritic patients.[3]  

Not to mention they simply taste extraordinary, nearly orgasmic.  So if the divine significance or the health benefits aren’t appealing enough than the intrigue of orgasmic pleasure shall surely convince you because let’s face it everybody likes sex.  Hey, sex appeal works for the advertising industry why can’t it work for me and my argument of how worthy this fruit is of your time.  I mean c’mon we know the gods liked them and we know the gods most certainly liked sex.  I’m just sayin’ it’s worth considering.


Tuesday, October 12, 2010

I'm a Healer

am grossly prone to falling, tripping, cutting, burning, and breaking.  I have crashed nearly everything I’ve ridden or driven and I am capable of tripping over a flat surface.  One time I was walking across the parking lot at St. Vincent’s, tripped, and fell into the box I was carrying.  Yes, into.  I’ve rolled my ankle so many times I barely notice it anymore.  Oh, and I tripped a couple weeks ago walking up a wheelchair ramp and mangled the inside of my arm and bruised my knee.  Unfortunately, this same knee, I’m pretty sure has a shattered kneecap due to a graceful move five years ago.  I’m pretty sure it shattered because it’s not there anymore.  Don’t believe me? Ask me and I’ll show you.  Yep, that time I was walking down the stairs thought I’d hit the last step, but surprise, surprise there was one left.  You see it was in an old building with a massive wooden door that had probably been standing for 30 or 40 years.  It was quality product.  Well, when I landed with all my weight on my knee against the door something was bound to give and it sure wasn’t going to be the damn door that had been standing for the last three or four decades.  Goodbye kneecap.  It bruised, swelled, and was sore to the touch for about three months.  Did I see a doctor you ask? Hell no.  We don’t DO doctors in my family. We walk it off.  Even if the walk is a little gimpy for awhile.  Well, if those two incidents, not to mention the hundreds of other times I’ve landed on that knee when I either slipped, tripped, or crashed wasn’t enough.  I’m pretty sure I partially dislocated it Sunday.  If the previous injuries hadn’t done so this certainly insures long-term arthritis.  You want to know what makes it more obnoxious an incident?  It’s not as though I have some grandiose story explaining the injury.  I wasn’t skiing the Swiss Alps, hell I wasn’t even skiing Eaglecrest.  Nope.  I was getting into the freakin’ car.  Yep, that’s right.  I was getting into the car.  My shoe slipped. Then sure shit my knee popped right out or in, inward toward the other knee when it bent unnaturally that way.  I have a fairly high threshold for pain, but I may have dropped the F word a time or ten and even shed a tear, maybe two.  The balance of my accident-prone self? I’m a fast healer.  My bruises disappear rapidly, the elbow I dislocated and was told would never straighten does (never wasn’t an option), and the gimpy knee I’m getting around on now?  Well, it’s still gimpy, but like I said I’ll walk it off.